Whatever Blog

 Hey there,  ...I had yet another urge to reach out to the wrong person. I'm not sure if anyone has picked up on it yet, but blogging is a huge coping tool for me.  What are your coping tools?  Sometimes, I make lists of all the things that make me happy. And on that list is making lists.  One thing I haven't done in a while is make art. I'm really proud of this creation with oil pastels and charcoal pencils: oil pastels, white charcoal, black charcoal The person looks kinda cross-eyed though, don't you think?  One thing about me is that I grew up as an artist. I had friends and good teachers who encouraged my work. Of course, I found other interests the same way and pursued those eventually, which took away from a lot of the art I could have been doing.  I think I also always thought that I couldn't make money or a living doing art, so I never took it seriously.  If you have any, please, share your art with me :) 

 "Understanding is Love's other name" ~~Thich Nhat Hahn Seriously, I just pull this stuff out of his short book, "How to Love", and then reflect on how what he says is relevant to my life and experience.  Today, I am really stressed out over a job interview that is happening tomorrow, but I am also sad and mourning over lost love. In just writing that, I have to remind myself:  Love is not possession Love is understanding  But often I remember the time he said I didn't understand him. It was the last time he ever spoke to me. It's hard to be cut out from someone's life, but I probably sound like I'm playing the victim says that when I don't deserve to be in his life. Even if I did deserve it, it's up to him, not me. And that's probably something he felt that I just didn't get or understand.  I won't hash it out though.  Sometimes I wonder if my friends B or E still check for posts on my blog, because I haven't posted in a ...